


Crave

by baeberiibungh



Category: Supernatural, Supernatural RPF
Genre: Character Bleed, Established poly relationships, F/M, I suck at tagging, M/M, Pining Cas, Timelines, dream walking i guess, dreamscape, implied stubborn Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-07
Updated: 2014-12-07
Packaged: 2018-02-28 11:15:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2730371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baeberiibungh/pseuds/baeberiibungh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas stalks Jensen Ackles' dreams about Misha</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crave

At first it was only in dreams. Jensen would wake up from heavy slumber, Misha’s face not his own, looking at him from the edges of whatever nightmare or dream Jensen was having, a naked thirst on his face. Waking up he would turn to Danneel or Misha, finding comfort in the sleepy pulls or strokes they would lavish on his back as he burrowed into their heat under the blankets.

In the bright light of day and the blazing arcs under the camera, Dean would become an easy mask to slip on and off. Nights were different things altogether. Suddenly plagued by insomnia, he took Jared’s advice to do some workup before he falls asleep, Danneel takes to rubbing his back and legs and Misha would make him drink hot milk with honey and crushed almonds. But sleep remained elusive.

It is called character bleed, he recalls from his classes taken so many years ago. That the character he is playing is so close to home or he is so invested in it that the mask now does not come off easy. Bits and pieces stick. And it pissed him off. Jensen had come to love Dean over the years, a real person from years of playing him on screen. He knows Dean better than he knows himself perhaps. But the dreams are steadily making him disconcerting.

Jensen realises the main thing is something stuck in his psyche. He knows he loves Misha, but perhaps his guilt from the time he steadily ignored him is the thing poking at him. Maybe that is why he sees Misha’s earliest avatar for him in his dreams, forever struck in the overcoat and a look of constipation, painful eyes and clenched cheekbones a permanent fixture in that personification.

He mentions this to Misha. Misha sends him a link on lucid dreaming and how to control dreams. Jensen laughs it off, saying he isn’t one for those stuff yet. Two weeks later he is. His mood is permeating his work place enough to make everyone tensed. Suddenly it is not Jensen wearing Dean, it is Dean wearing the facsimile of Jensen Ackles, self loathing and repressed feeling galore, sending people who care about him to scurry around worry ceaselessly.

That is when Jensen decided to read up Misha’s link, any port in a storm shit kinda way. So he reads, plans and then on his first try itself, he opens his eyes to see Misha. Except it is not Misha. It is not even Misha playing Castiel. It is Castiel, the angel of the lord, in flesh, mostly inhabiting that body of that banker he took, who looks just like his Misha, but is not, and he understands. What he understands Jensen is not sure at the moment. But he is not so agitated anymore.

Misha, no, Cas looks at him steadily. Around them plays out a favourite dream of Jensen’s. It was a family picnic in deep woods, where Danneel and Vicki came along with the kids and everyone had an amazing time. At that time Jensen imagined small fairies and wood nymphs running around the forest. In his dream they do, flitting among the people unseeing and shrilly singing some trills of merriment.

He is in the dream, talking and laughing, but he is also there where Misha, no no, Cas was peering at both of him. Cas looks on with the same hunger, his eyes lingering on how familiar the four are in each other’s company. Danneel scoops a strawberry into Jensen’s mouth and Jensen does the same to Misha who feeds some blueberry to West and Vicki. All of them look like a happy family, and Jensen thanks his lucky stars for them.

Jensen turns to Cas, and asks, “Why are you here? You should not be here. This is not your world.”

Cas starts and looks at the Jensen nearer to him and says, “You are not of the dream. You are awake. I did not realise.”

“Yeah well, I think it’s about time you and I have a talk, yes? You are plaguing my dreams and making my life difficult. What the hell do you want from me? I mean you are an angel aren’t you? So why the fuck are you in my head?” Jensen spits out bitterly.

Cas looks ashamed at this. He looks at his feet at this. In a low gravelly voice he says, “I will refrain from visiting your dreams again. I truly did not wish to give you any problems. My intensions were to merely see how you interacted with the one whose visage I share in this body. You look very happy with him as does he. It makes me wonder. I wonder perhaps with Dean... I mean. Never you mind. I will not search for your dreams again.”

“Wait wait wait,” Jensen is already holding his elbow, his body moving and mouth opening to stop him even before he is aware, “Do you mean to tell me that since Dean refuses to, well, return your affections, you have been spying on Misha and me to look what it looks like? You want to know how you would look like with Dean yourself is what you are saying?” Jensen asks incredulously.

Cas doesn’t say anything. And that is answer enough. He in fact looks even more miserable now, as if the fact that Jensen could make out his reasoning made him more pathetic. Jensen looked at the man. Or rather the angel. He could feel his heart twisting. This was of course not Misha, but it was Misha’s face. And to see such a sad look on his face hurt Dean even though he knew it was a weird thing to feel for someone he saw in a dream.

“Look, I know Dean. And I know he has feeling for you. So why don’t you say something to him rather than pining for him? Just say what you want to and wait. Don’t take his first answer as the correct one, you just wait. He will come to you. Just, er, maybe don’t come to my dreams again ok?” asks Jensen with a Dean-ish quirked eyebrow. And he finds himself glad that he said that because Cas looks very happy now.

“Yes I will. I will do as I say. And I am sorry. I couldn’t travel to your time as I would have been unable to return. That is why I came only to your dreams. Dreams are accessible from many points and fractures. And thank you for your advice. I will be going now. Good sleep to you,” says Cas and disappears from Jensen’s dream. So Jensen turns to look at his dream and when morning comes, he finds himself refreshed for the first time in months.

Three days later, he gets a call from the writer’s room where everyone agrees it is time to make Jensen and Misha kiss. Hearing this Jensen gives a small smile. So Cas finally did grow a pair and asked Dean out.

**Author's Note:**

> my grammar is absolute shit here. i am so sorry. my tense have gone out of windows and killed my brain or whatever. let me know how you guys like it. or not like it. yay. insomnia is sooooo cool after 40 hrz woohoo. i may have a problem.


End file.
